Man MS

My huny is doing something that has me puzzled. he's being normal.

No matter what men think, they go through PMS sometimes worse than women. It's Man MS...they get quiet, get attitudes, grumpy, moody, walk around with a frown, easily ticked off etc etc. and when you bring this to their attention they have no idea what you're talking about...riiiiight

so that's currently Garette's mood, or at least it was and then almost overnight he's showing up at my girls night, talking non-stop, smiling, caring and on the phone said "i love you baby"... whooa.... what's going on?

for a minute there i thought we were on a reality show cause this certainly doesn't seem real (none of them are). then a kiss while I'm sleeping, a call in the middle of the day, it's like when we first met.... i mean the middle of the day to say "what's up". no ulterior motive, doesn't need anything, just hi.

I'm not complaining about his recent behavior modifications, if anything it's made things happier at home, more comfortable.

and yea a little on edge to see where the pin will drop.

shut ur trap

OK, let me clear the air cause this became a pet peeve very recently. Do not under any circumstances, critique my food while I'm eating, interrupt me while I'm eating, or have anything to say about what I'm eating before i get to eat or afterwards. In a nutshell, shut your trap and mind your own business.

This is what you misunderstand. When i say my clothes don't fit, i mean, my clothes no longer fit me. I'm not fat, I'm happy with my body. i could be a bit more toned but in essence I'm sexy as hell, make no mistake about it and that comes NATURALLY. the only reason i complain, is b/c bills have to be paid, thus i can't buy a new wardrobe to accommodate my figure.

as ladies, we all go through those times when our bodies naturally take on more water and bloat and we feel like shit, so i may complain then too but really, i didn't ask your opinion, nor do i care for it. the fact that ppl see a bag that says McDonald's, you really think that i must have the entire menu inside of it, or maybe it's a salad, or maybe it's ice cream, or even 1 cheeseburger and an apple pie. maybe the fact that that's all i eat for the rest of the night plays into the reason I'm not 200 lbs.

not that i need to give anyone an explanation but during a 5 day work week i allow myself 1 lunchtime of bad food and it's usually followed up at home by 8 pieces of cheese and crackers for dinner or vegetables. the rest of the week i have lunch from home followed by a sandwich for dinner.

so, whether it was a joke or not, it was uncalled for and rude.

it is what it is take it or leave it

OK, there are positives and negatives about writing a blog. The problem being that this is me in my rawest form, un-edited, un-rehearsed. The words pour from my heart to my head unto the screen and then for the world to see. At most times, it's in the heat of anger, other times just trying to see through the confusion and most often than not, i don't read it back. it is what it is take it or leave it.

I chose to write this blog about me, my experiences, my life, my angers, my peeves, my joys, hurts, funnies, stupid stories and just silly situations. I chose to share a part of me that most people thought they knew but suddenly realize, they don't. I chose to voice through words what I most often can't through emotions cause i have too much of those...that was a choice that was easy for me to do since i love writing and i stopped so long ago.

the problem you ask? Well that comes when people read it...

I would say, don't take it too seriously but these are real emotions. My Epiphany's, which i tell you that I've come to without actually saying what they were, are real. But if you haven't gotten it yet, let me share something else with you....

I'm not huggy, my emotions are kept on the inside until i decide to voice them. I don't get excited about having "private girl time" because it seems too forced. I bond over everyday life experiences; hanging out, everyday sharing, 'catching up' over a plate of potato skins while other tables chatter with their own business is ideal for me. Being around any person too much annoys me and they will eventually annoy me and that is when i fall back...but I'm never far. I go through moods, i have bouts of depression for no reason at all. I hate bullshit so if you're one of those ppl that bullshit to yourself chances are you annoy me with it. I forgive but i never forget. I'm super observant and catch things you don't realize you revealed. I'm always there to help and to listen. If i have done you wrong, let me know cause I can't fix my behavior if I'm unaware. but

if you show no interest in my life it will take me a while to warm up to you again no matter how close you thought we were. it's not me being spiteful, it's me protecting myself. i may come off a bit cold, but you can't force me back, it'll come back when it does. besides, i always get quiet when i have a lot to work out for myself.

I'm back

It's been so long since I've written anything. My week-long vacation to Barbados was amazing and I have to say certain parts made me long for taking a vacation alone with Garette. I have yet to upload the pics but when I do, I have an amazing sunset shot off the terrace of our hotel.

We must have went all over the island although I did NOT get to see the college with my Surname. We usually take a picture there. Everything seemed so familiar but still so new to me, granted it's only been 8 years since I've been back, for my brother that also went, over 20 years. However, we won't make that mistake again.